Текст песни М.Жванецкий - Одесский Телефон

It is a misconception that you have to hook a man . In Odessa phone - a crowd of people in a single tube . You just take off , there are already beginning to make a fuss :

- This is who joined us ?
- Do not you hear ?
- Yes, I hear , I hear . But he was silent . Are you overhear ?
- I did not overhear . I speak from the hospital . I need Mila . Mila , I need soap. Soap, I need.
- You have just joined ?
- Yes, it has long been said .
- No, this one, with soap and water , for a long time .
- And this one is listening . What do you listen ?
- I do not listen . I look forward to when you're done . You could not put a tube?
- Why do we have to put the tube? We started before you.
- But all the time I get ...
- And all the time I hit it .
- I'm sorry , I'm not interested in your conversations .
- And I'm not interested yours.
- Hello , comrades, ladies and gentlemen , I'm sorry , I'm out of the hospital . We have one phone for forty patients. I plead . I was robbed of soap, you represent ! Hello, Mila ?
- Yes .
- It's not you .
- I am , I am.
- Mila !
- J.
- Is that Mila ?
- I am , I am.
- Mila !
- Yes!
- What?
- Yes.
- Hello, this is lovely ?
- I am , I am.
- Lord , citizens , comrades , I'm out of the hospital , stop ! I press again . Allo .
- J.
- This is Mila ?
- I am , I am.
- Who is it?
- J.
- Is that you?
- Yes!
- What are you, bitch , passed into English ? Sorry , I'll retype . Hello, this is Mila ?
- What is Mila ? Guys, I have that blue ? Come on up, give a talk .
- Hello , citizens , comrades. I'm quiet. We have a very important business call. Just three minutes of silence . Very, very important .
- Hello .
- Well .
- So did you give him ?
- Gave .
- And he took ?
- Took .
- Why he did not do anything ? Or do you not give ?
- Gave .
- And he took ?
- Took .
- Why he did not do anything . You're given ?
- All .
- And he took ?
- All took .
- And you said that we need ?
- Said .
- And he gave ?
- And he gave .
- And he took ?
- And he took them.
- Why he did not do anything ?
- Maybe you can not give ?
- What could I give?
- And he took ?
- Took .
- Maybe he did not have time ?
- In time, in time. He quickly took ocheno .
- And did you tell him how much?
- Said .
- And he took ?
- Took .
- And you said that we should sign ?
- Said .
- What did he say ?
- Leave it .
- And did you leave ?
- And I left .
- And he gave him everything?
- And he gave him everything.
- And he took ?
- And he took them.
- All of them?
- All .
(Silence ).
- Well , let's wait .
- Look, maybe even give ?
- And he will take ?
- Will take .
- The main thing is , that he took .
- Will take .
- Then we have to give.
- I think I 'll give .
- Hello , lady , enter me please , 32-48-75 , I did not connect.
- What , you little people in the tube ?
- Well , I'm just very urgent need. Hello, Tolia ..
- Wait, I have not yet won .
- Hello , Tolia . This Toll ?
- Yes .
- Toll ...
- What is the Toll ? Disconnect .
- No . Roofing , Roofing felt , do not disconnect .
- Disconnect . I speak from the hospital . I need soap . I seriously ill stole soap.
- Toll , are you in the hospital?
- Oh, no .
- How & lt; no & gt ;.
- I 'm talking from the hospital .
- It was not me .
- Mila , do not look, I'm in the hospital. He lies all .
- I'm talking Tolia . Roofing , you need to pass the questionnaire.
- So where to go?
- Go to the Visa Office .
- Go to the hospital.
- Since the Visa Office or the hospital?
- In the Visa Office . Roofing , you must pass ... Hello , who's there to join?
- Evdokia Ivanovna , allo ...
First : - Yes .
Second : - Yes .
Third : - Yes .
- Who is it joined ?
- You're all now , fool sassy .
- Hello , Evdokia Ivanovna , turn on the TV and say , there is sound or not? Allo .
First : - Yes .
Second : - Yes .
Third : - Yes .
- Can you hear me , Evdokia Ivanovna ? ..
First : - Yes .
Second : - Yes .
Third : - Yes .
- They then require you to say . They do not want to come . They require you to say : there is sound or not?
- I do not know . Noise is. The noise is the sound ?
- No noise - it does not sound. They tell you to say : there is sound or not?
- I do not know . Noise is. The noise is the sound ?
- No noise - at