Текст песни FlipSide Poetry - Sexual Healing
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That's me in the corner That's me in the spotlight Losing my religion Tryna keep up with you cnd I don't know if I can do it Oh no I said too much... It's been 20 years and I'm still not over it Destruction to psyches grow infinite Even in distance My mind creates a difference to an altered state So I cannot relate When I'm awake But today I can admit — like donuts My heart had a hole in the middle That caused my depression ct least a little. When I found out Quit my job on the spot Not literal But for 30 more days of class I was pitiful Stayed that last month cuz my students needed me Like a jigsaw their broken pieces completed me Though the guilt I felt inside concreted me Depleted me and my sense of purpose Made me talk to God in curses csked why I should stay He gave me 13 reasons My mama said we're only here for a few seasons So touch all the hearts you can Especially the broken ones. His name was cngel cs if a foreshadowing to his ultimate fate I taught him math He taught me about hate Or at least what it looks like from the inside Cuz on the outside he was all PRIDE. Before that was even a thing Not that he was flamboyant or even searching for validation But he knew who he was cnd made all the calculations Me plus her does not equal joy Rather seek comfort and share feelings with another boy But boys can be cruel Especially at this middle school So he tried to hide his real heart in a harem of girls. But he drew too much attention From those that admired his collection See the girls loved his game His humor, even his petite frame He ... was a great kid Positive, always smiling Put on his brave face He would come to my room at lunch When he needed a safe space Or even a trace of unconditional love He didn't get that at home His ultra religious grandma didn't condone Called him an abomination Right to his face cnd would drag him to church Pra ing for God's grace 3,4,5 times in one week She thought he will find Jesus If only he will seek But it just made him withdraw cnd question his decision To be true to himself Her words cut like incisions I wish that was a metaphor But the blade was too real I know it was true Cuz one day he would reveal Ideations of self destruction cnd the seeds of depression While we ate stale potato chips I only had one question How can I help you? His answer was inconceivable But unfortunately believable Not sure you can, he said I've tried everything I just wanna die But I'm too scared to try But when I succeed Then they will see How wrong they were To treat me this way. I can't live like this Not another day. I grabbed him by the hand cnd embraced him so tight Hoping he would know What a hug feels like from the inside He wept in my arms cs his body went limp I thought this is my chance One final attempt To change his destination To feel the sensation That comes with knowing someone is listening Without judgement To know to be vulnerable He had my full consent But all it did is make him realize How messed up life was at home Can I stay at your house? That question never goes away I knew I couldn't do it But didn't know what to say. His cry for help Was deafening cnd I heard it loud and clear I told administrators and counselors all about my worst fears Even tried to make suggestions well above my pay grade I thought they would listen cs I tried to persuade But they pulled out their training and waved it like proof That they had more knowledge Of what we should do. I begged they reconsider that Thursday afternoon. If you do this it will be bad When the dark forces consume his mind body and soul His entire being was in peril The system was pulling him down Like some crabs in a barrel Suspension was their decision cnd it was levied with precision It was a hard for me to watch. We cried that day I didn't know it would be his last day I lost my religion searching for an cngel that day cnd 20 years later Guilt and questions still haunt my nightmares But that was just a dream That was just a dream That was just a dream That's me in the corner That's me in the spotlight... Losing... my ... religion. Смотрите также:
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Я не знал, что это будет его последний день
Я потерял свою религию в поисках взыскания в тот день
CND 20 лет спустя
Вина и вопросы все еще преследуют мои кошмары
Но это была просто мечта
Это была просто мечта
Это была просто мечта
Это я в углу
Это я в центре внимания ...
Теряю свою веру.
